Swingers who are young, make a up a relatively large portion of couples who are new to swinging. What makes them choose this path at such a young age?
Swingers who are young, are a relatively new phenomenon in the lifestyle. When we think of swingers, the picture that comes to mind tends to be that of a middle aged couple who have been married for many years. It makes sense for people to see a couple who has been united for a long time entering the lifestyle in search of something new and exciting. This couple has, after all, been in a long term relationship. Generally, they have children and busy lives but are looking for something to enrich their relationship together. We can understand why the lifestyle would appeal to these couples. It is not as easy, however, to understand what brings younger aged swingers into the lifestyle. Over the past few years the lifestyle has seen a dramatic increase in the number of couples under the age of 40 and even couples under the age of 30. What brings them into the lifestyle and what are they looking for?
Most swingers say that their decision to enter the lifestyle did not come easily or quickly.
For many couples, they were married for many years and found themselves in a sexual rut. They tried porn and strip clubs and role playing and sharing fantasies but they were looking for something more. Many couples confessed that they fantasized about playing with other people they know, such as friends and coworkers, but did not want to be unfaithful or destroy their relationships. The decision to try swinging was mutual and for most couples, even when they agreed to check it out, it took some time before they actually stepped inside a lifestyle venue.
This brings us to the newer generation of swingers.
Based on their age alone, it is not possible that most have been together for a long period of time. Most couples under the age of 40 have not been together for more than 10 years or so; for the under 30 crowd, less than that. This means they cannot use the argument that they have been together for 20+ years and have fallen into a rut. Why then, after this short a period of time are couples already looking to swing? It could be that swinging is less underground than it was just ten years ago. It is not hard to go online and find a club or site to meet other swingers. There are many articles and blogs available as well which give vanilla couples insight into the swingers world which did not exist only a few short years ago. This means that more people are aware of the lifestyle than in the past. Perhaps some of the older swingers would have been apart of the lifestyle when they were younger had they known about it.
This generation is different from previous generations.
Most people would think that the baby boomers would be the most sexually open generation as they grew up in the era of sex, drugs and rock and roll. Sure they had their Woodstock and their wild times but were they really more open than the generations that followed; perhaps not. Consider generation X, which includes people born from 1975-1985. These people are part of the MTV generation, they were growing up during the rise of mass media and were exposed to things at a much younger age than the previous generations were. They had access to information that nobody before them had. Let us consider that the most provocative thing baby boomers were able to see for most of their younger lives was a Playboy magazine and they were not easy to come by. As they hit early adulthood XXX movies on VCRs were pretty risqué and kept well hidden. Generation X had access to porn from the time they were old enough to use the internet. A good many kids in this generation were having sex at very young ages and experimenting with group sex, public sex and bisexuality by the time they were in high school. Ecstasy was the drug of choice for this generation and it has a reputation that fuels the notion that this generation might be more sexual than people in the 1960s were. It is not hard to understand then, why these young couples might get bored much faster than the previous generation and seek out something more exciting.
As the lifestyle keeps evolving and enticing more people, it is nice to see young people enjoy the atmosphere and warmth of the lifestyle.
Perhaps this younger generation will slow down the divorce rate with their more open minded ways. Although couples who swing obviously also can divorce, they generally are not divorcing due to infidelity! According to Dr. William H. Doherty, noted marriage scholar and therapist, 55% of the time, infidelity is the reason for a divorce. That is an extremely large number of couples citing this as the primary reason for their divorce. It is uncommon for couples in the lifestyle to have this problem as swinging is something couples do together and would not consider swinging as a form of cheating. Keeping this in mind, perhaps younger swingers are on to something.
As this more youthful generation of swingers are a new edition to the lifestyle, it is too soon to tell what path this will lead them down. My gut tells me that they will benefit from having a more open and honest approach to keeping their marriage happy and exciting. Only time will tell!