Swingers: Why is it a secret that you are in the lifestyle?

Woman in lifestyle wearing Partners ID choker necklace

Are people still afraid to let others know that they are in the lifestyle?

Why do swingers feel the need to keep their lifestyle a secret?  I frequently hear swingers say that nobody knows that they are in the lifestyle.  They would die if someone found out.   Why is that?  What do people think when they hear someone they know is a swinger?  It reminds me of the time before I had ever had sex.   I couldn’t imagine how you could face the person you had sex with afterward.  What would they think after they had seen you in such a compromising way?  How would others see you? Obviously I discovered that these fears were unfounded.  Nobody seemed to look at me any differently, and facing the guy who I was with was no problem.  So what is it that makes us fear discovery?

 What is it that swingers fear about exposure?

Curiosity got the best of me and so I started to ask swingers.  I asked a group of swingers if they are very religious, but they are not.  I wondered if their children were at an age that it would create confusion and uncertainty, but they are not.  Do they think they are doing something criminal or unethical?  They do not.  Hmm.  Would exposure embarrass them?   This question got a nod.   Embarrassed? Why?  In truth, swingers are doing something that most people wish they could do.  They have sex with others and it doesn’t destroy their marriage.  Why?  Because two consenting adults have agreed to enter into this together.  There are no lies or secrets.

Would friends and family alienate you if they found out you were having an affair?

Admitting that you are a swinger should be a lot less traumatic than admitting you are having an affair, no?  After all, one is cheating and lying to someone you say you are in love with, the other is not.  Cheaters sneak around, worrying that they will be caught.   Getting caught would disrupt their lives and the lives of those around them.  Swingers, on the other hand, are out having a great time together.  They are out enjoying parties and events with their significant other.  This is something that others only dream of.

I wonder how many swingers are truly living this lifestyle unbeknownst to their friends and family.  Probably not nearly as many as believe they are.  Often times I watch swingers arrive at a club clad in an oversized trench coat in the middle of the summer.  When I ask these women if their family or neighbors don’t find this strange they say they don’t think so.  Really?  It’s 90 degrees outside and you leave your house or condo wearing a trench coat cinched at the waist with stiletto heels and nobody thinks that’s odd?

What happens to couples who come clean about the lifestyle?

Many swingers have said that when they finally decided to disclose to friends and family that they were swingers, many were not surprised.  Many said they had known about it for years but understood the swinger couple wanted to keep it to themselves.  (If these were the trench coat women, it’s no wonder people knew.)

What about the family and friends who did not suspect this person or couple was in the lifestyle?  What was their reaction?  Were they shocked and appalled?  Not according to the people I have spoken with.  Most said that more than anything, they were curious about swinging.  They asked a lot of questions but did not seem to have a negative reaction.  Many couples said that both friends and many family members (mostly siblings), eventually asked if they could tag along one night to see what it was all about.

Stop apologizing for your lifestyle choices; it’s your life and your decision to make.

Like any other group, in order to gain acceptance, we must learn to stand up for what we believe in.  Swingers should not be ashamed of their lifestyle.  Obviously it is not necessary to divulge what you do when you are at a swing club, or party, or another event.  Most people do not give blow by blow (pun intended) details to others about what they do in their bedrooms.  No need to reveal that you participated in a gang bang with 15+ men last Saturday. Nobody needs to know that you tried double penetration for the first time and loved it.  Many swingers don’t swap, and many people in the lifestyle are not swingers.  Enjoying the warm atmosphere that accompanies the lifestyle is a wonderful thing and people should not have to hide from it.

Why do people find it acceptable to learn that many famous couples are swingers?  Why are they held to a different standard than the rest of us.  Because they are famous?   Some are highly influential people and they do not deny that they are swingers.  Famous people frequently answer questions about their lifestyle and seem quite comfortable doing so.

What does wearing lifestyle jewelry actually say about you?

Wearing our jewelry means that you are open-minded.  If you think about it, being a part of the lifestyle really doesn’t mean more than that.   If your children or parents told you the same thing, would it concern you?  Although it might surprise you, you would  be happy to see them happy.

When we initially came up with the concept for the jewelry, we had just this vision in mind.  Wear the jewelry with pride.  First of all, others do not know what it means.  Secondly, even if they did, what does it really say about you?  It says that you are an open-minded person.

Let’s continue the movement to unite the lifestyle.  People in the lifestyle could really teach others a lot about relationships.  Honesty, respect and fun are the three hallmarks of the lifestyle.  What could be better than that?

To see our collection of lifestyle jewelry click here:  https://www.swingersjewelry.net/jewelry-for-swingers/page/2/

Never in a million years did I think I would be in the lifestyle!

An email we received from a customer:

Dear Partners ID,

My husband and I have been married for 25 years. We have children who are now living on their own and we both have careers that keep us busy. One evening after dinner, we settled into our typical nightly routine of watching tv on the couch. We talked about the upcoming weekend and who we wanted to go out with. I was shocked when my husband told me he couldn’t stand how routine our lives had become. We work all week, have dinner at home and on weekends go out to dinner or a movie with basically the same couples. He was afraid that our lives, now that our children were grown, would remain like this forever.  The thought of it made him sad.

Honestly, it was the first time I had ever thought about it, but I realized he was right. There was nothing to look forward to anymore; every week was the same.

That night I couldn’t sleep so I went on the computer to try to research what else couples at our stage of life were doing for fun. I came across a blog written by Penny which directed me to your website. At first, I was chuckling to myself about the prospect of Joe and myself as swingers, but as I read more blogs I started to realize that it really was about so much more than sex.

I started to research what exactly the swinging lifestyle entailed and thought it was worth mentioning to Joe. Never in a million years could I have imagined something like this, but I must admit, I was very curious.

When I initially mentioned it to Joe over coffee in the morning he thought I was insane. He, too, laughed at the thought.

For the first time in I don’t know how many years, he sent me a text and asked if we could meet for lunch. He told me he couldn’t get the thought out of this out of his mind and was excited that it was something I had an interest in. We had no idea how to go about the whole thing so I came back to your website to see what I could find.

It didn’t take long to find articles I needed to get started. We did some research online regarding local swing clubs and also spent some time looking at swinger dating sites. I will tell you that our sex life changed that very first night that we started to think about it! It was like something sparked inside both of us and we were alive and excited about what was to come!

Fast forward one year and our lives have changed dramatically. It has been years since my husband and I have been this happy and connected.  We look forward to our weekends with our new lifestyle friends and all the adventures! Each weekend we now go to parties and swing clubs and have booked a lifestyle cruise for the fall! Of course, we both wear your jewelry (proudly) and wanted to thank you for helping us find what we never knew we were looking for!

The friends that we used to spend every weekend with have noticed the difference in us but we don’t dare tell them what we are up to! We both work out several days a week and look younger and more fit than we have in years. Even our children see the change!

One of the biggest benefits of this lifestyle is the friends we have made. We are closer to them than any of the friends we have had in the past. We travel with them, meet them at clubs and even have sleepovers! What fun!

Thank you for opening our eyes to a wonderful new world! Your blogs are wonderfully honest and informative and your jewelry is beautiful! We wish you all the happiness that we have found!

xoxo
Debbie and Joe

Looking for our lifestyle jewelry? Simply click here: https://www.swingersjewelry.net/jewelry-for-swingers/

Have you ever been sure another couple swings but did not want to ask?

Woman at barbecue with swingers necklace

Hi Partners ID,

This story should help others realize why this jewelry is important.  Everyone in the lifestyle spends so much time trying to find other swingers.  Half the time, they are right under your nose, you just don’t realize it!

My wife and I are big football fans.  Having both grown up in the same state, we are fortunate to root for the same team. Our three boys are also very big fans of the sport as well.  For years we had 5 season tickets and never missed a game.  We tailgated before every game and never left before it was over. 

Now that our sons are grown and have lives of their own, it is just the two of us attending games.  We still enjoy tailgating and have met many people over the years who do the same.  

Here’s the part you are waiting for.  As we have met many couples over the years at football games, we have had our suspicions  about which ones might be in the lifestyle.  Although we have always prided ourselves on having an ability to pick out the swingers, this was not a place we wanted to take the chance.  We tried dropping hints, using the term vanilla, etc., but no bites from any of the couples we suspected.   It got to the point that my wife wanted to simply ask two of the couples.  She was so sure that they were both in the lifestyle.  I begged her not to out us to this group just in case she was wrong.

Many couples at our local swing club wear Partners ID jewelry.  Having admired it for so long, we decided to each buy a piece.  As we know by now, most swingers are aware of your jewelry and so we decided to wear ours to a football game.  We made sure it was easy for other people to see it during the tailgating party.  We made it a point to speak with all the couples we had suspected might be in the lifestyle.  Nothing!  I had a moment when someone admired it but I realized it was just a compliment and nothing more.  It seemed pretty obvious that these couples were probably not swingers. 

During the game, I left my wife to go the restroom.  When I returned, a woman was sitting in my seat chatting with my wife.  When she saw me she jumped up.  She took out her cellphone and handed it to my wife, who inputted her number and said we would be in touch.  My wife introduced me to the woman before she quickly returned to her own seat.  

Guess what, she saw the jewelry!  They have had the seats a few rows in front of us for 7 years and had often waved to us.  Although, prior to today, we had no way of knowing, they are swingers!  

We did meet them for drinks the following weekend and they are a super couple. It turns out, this couple noticed us about 5 years ago.  They had no idea we were in the lifestyle and had no intentions of ever asking.  It was the jewelry that told them that we are swingers!  There is no question that we will see them again soon.

The most unfortunate part of this story is that it made us think about all of the missed opportunities.  Obviously this is not the only time we have been around other swingers and simply had no way of knowing.  

We now wear it everyday and look forward to discovering who else we have been overlooking all of this time!

Thanks for listening!

Warmest wishes,

David and Kate

Miami, FL

See the beautiful jewelry David and Kate were wearing here:  https://www.swingersjewelry.net/jewelry-for-swingers/

Swinging; how do I bring up the topic to my significant other?

Wearing Partners ID jewelry is a good way to meet others in the lifestyle.

The most common question asked of swingers seems to be, “How do I get my husband/wife/girlfriend, etc., into the lifestyle?”  

There are many people out there who know about swinging and would like to swing. The problem is, they don’t know how to bring up the subject to their partner.

We have gotten quite a few emails from people who actually ask us this question. I’m not sure how I became the “Dr. Ruth” of swinging but I really don’t mind trying to help.

The majority of the time, this question comes from a man, but we have had women ask us as well. The interesting part is that many people have said the same thing. We often talk about how exciting it would be to bring another person into bed with us.  Although we both get turned on, I’m not sure how to make the leap to actually making this happen!

It is always a good sign if you have a good sexual relationship and can talk about things before you bring this up. It would seem to me that when you approach the subject, it should not be in the bedroom.

Many people like to fantasize to get excited but are not really prepared to act on these erotic imageries.

Several men said their wives get very turned when talking about having sex with multiple men at once. The operative word here is talk. There is a good chance that she is not prepared to actually do this in real life.  So how can you make this happen?

Try talking about how much you love to see your partner so turned on during sex. You love that they like to watch porn or to fantasize. Express how amazing it is that the two of you can share this together.

Mention that something you have always fantasized about was seeing other people have sex. Live sex, not on tv. How hot would that be?  This way you simply mention your desire to find a place where you can actually watch others having sex. This takes the pressure off of your partner.  You are not making your partner feel that they will have to be a part of it.

Check her reaction to a suggestion such as watching live sex.

Does she look at you like you are crazy or does she have a flicker of interest? If you get the ‘you’re crazy’ look, drop it and mention it again at a later time. The next time maybe say you came across this swing club online or in a magazine or a newspaper. After a while, she might get used to the thought. Perhaps your partner would be willing to just go and take a look. Again, it is extremely important to let her know that you just want to see it. That is all you want. This is, the first step.

Most women I have met in the lifestyle agree that it was not their idea to enter a swing club or check out any type of lifestyle venue. It is almost always the man’s suggestion. However, I will tell you that the woman is the one who requests to return. That being said, the major obstacle for most couples, is getting your partner to walk through the front door for the first time.

The smartest approach for many men seems to be to give the woman control of the situation from the very beginning.

When you are able to get her to agree to try it out for one night, encourage her to buy something new that will make her feel good. It is not important that she dress overly sexy, only that she feel good about herself. Try not to be overly eager about getting to the club or event. If you take a more casual attitude towards going, it will make her less nervous.

Most important of all, is when you arrive for the evening, make sure she is your number one priority.

Check to make sure she is comfortable. Make her feel special and attractive. If you walk in and start ogling all the other women, she will not like the environment from the get go. It is ok to be friendly, but let her take the lead and decide who she is comfortable talking to or not talking to. The same goes for a woman bringing a man. If you start to flirt with other people right away, your partner will feel insecure. Swinging must be about the two of you as a couple. If you leave your partner in the background during your visit, chances are, you will not be returning to any type of lifestyle event with them in the future.

The lifestyle is an amazing, exciting and warm environment.

There is no real reason why anyone would not enjoy it, as long as it is approached the right way. The number one problem that couples seem to have, which stops them from ever getting comfortable in the lifestyle, is jealousy. Nobody enjoys feeling insecure or left out. If you do not make it a priority to see to it that your partner is comfortable, they will not want to put themselves in this situation again, and who can blame them?

When you are new to swinging, it is very important to take your time.

Do not enter the lifestyle and think you should swing right away. It is more important to get adjusted to the situation before you take the plunge. Make sure that when you think you are both ready to take the next step, you have discussed it and know what you are both comfortable with. Always make sure to notice if your significant other is ok if you do swap with another couple.

Communication is the key to success in the lifestyle.

At the end of any night together it is a good idea to talk about the experience to make sure she/he was happy and comfortable with what happened. As long as you keep the lines of communication open from the start, you should have no trouble joining the lifestyle and making it a smooth transition. Swinging should be something wonderful for both members of a couple. It cannot work if one person is dragging the other person into it against their will.

Good luck and keep us posted!!

A sure way to find others in the lifestyle is by wearing our jewelry.  Each piece sports the international symbol for swinger.  To see the jewelry click here:  www.swingerjewelry.net/jewelry-for-swingers

 

 

A single man in the lifestyle, a very happy ending.

Single man wearing Partners ID Lifestyle jewelry

Dear Partners ID,

I am a single man and I am in the lifestyle.  Let me tell you, it’s not easy for single men.  It’s easy to understand why people have such a negative reaction to single men in the lifestyle.  Trust me, even I have received dick pics in my inbox and I’m not even bi.

It actually takes more effort from the good guys to get past the stigma that is attached to us due to men with bad intentions and/or poor judgment.  Luckily for me, people tend to be able to differentiate the good guys from the bad relatively quickly.  

Although some think otherwise before getting to know me, I am not in the lifestyle for “easy” or “non-committal” sex.  Believe it or not, I took to the lifestyle to find love.  Yes, love, I was looking for a wife.

Like most people who know me, this revelation seemed to shock people.  Why on earth would you look for a wife in a swing club?  That’s like looking for a needle in a haystack! 

Growing up, my parents were swingers.  Although I did not know when I was a kid, I discovered their “secret” when I was in my teens.  It was confusing at first, but after the initial shock, I realized my parents seemed happier than any of my friend’s parents.  They didn’t say they had sex with other people, just that they had close relationships as couples.  It took me a little bit of research on my own to figure out what exactly they were trying to say.

After I turned 40, I realized that I had been serial dating for years and could not seem to find what I was looking for.  After internet dating sites, picking girls up at bars and being set up on countless blind dates I was ready to give up.  Many of the women I dated started out great, but not long into the relationship I could feel the change.  Sex was never as important to them as it was to me.  I wanted to find a woman who actually loved sex and this proved to be very difficult!

Growing up with parents who were constantly physical with each other, I knew this was possible, I just had to find it.  This is what led me to the lifestyle.  

Although there are not too many single women at any lifestyle event, there are always a few.  And guess what?  Many of them are in the lifestyle because they love sex!  It was not hard to meet unicorns and I have dated quite a few over the past few years.  Guess what?  This is not how I met my wife!

Believe it or not, I was in a swing club and saw your lifestyle jewelry!  I bought a necklace and started wearing it all the time.  Even if it wasn’t going to work, I love the design.

Not long after I started wearing it, I met a woman while at a sports bar who noticed the necklace.  She knew what it meant and we started to talk.  That was almost one year ago to the day and we are getting married in March.  Wow!  Best $50 I have ever spent!  And if you are all wondering, yes, she loves sex!

Sorry for the long story but it has a happy ending that I wanted to share with you!  I also want to give a shout out to your customer service girl Julie, who is so patient and kind!  Happy New Year and best wishes to all of you!

Carson

Detroit, MI

Be sure to check out our lifestyle jewelry here:

https://www.swingersjewelry.net/jewelry-for-swingers/

And remember, only Partners ID lifestyle jewelry is recognized around the world.

A New Year’s Eve story that almost didn’t have a happy ending.

New Year's eve couple wearing Partners ID lifestyle jewelry

My wife’s favorite night of the year happens to be New Year’s Eve.  She loves shopping for a special dress, getting her hair done and spending the night at her favorite swing club.

My wife and I have been in the lifestyle for a long time (almost 20 years).  Our social life is limited to swing clubs and private parties, meet and greets and Sunday fundays.  We vacation at Desire and try to catch at least one lifestyle cruise every year.  Yes, we are hard core but this is our life and we love it.

We spend every Christmas in South Florida visiting my parents.   We discovered Trapeze about 10 years ago and have been going there every New Year’s Eve since discovering this club.  This year was to be no exception.  

We arrived in Florida for Christmas Eve and settled in for our 2 week stay.  Everything was great until we got a phone call early December 31 from her mother.  Her dad was admitted to the hospital with chest pains and they believed he had suffered a heart attack.

We soon boarded a plane and headed to Connecticut to see her dad.  Our only thought at this point was her dad and his health.

Long story short, we arrived at the hospital and her dad was resting comfortably.  He had not had a heart attack but did require a stent to prevent one.  He was fine and would be released the next morning.  We drove her mom home and she wanted nothing more than to sleep.

So here it is New Year’s Eve, in Connecticut, and we have no place to go.  Since my wife did not actually grow up in Connecticut, she is not familiar with the night life.  It was getting late so we decided to at least try to find a restaurant where we could enjoy a nice dinner.  

Not far from where her parents live is a tavern that advertised live music and dancing.  At least it was something!  The bar was lively with groups of people out to celebrate New Years Eve.  They had a large screen tv set up to watch the ball drop in Times Square.  My wife and I were anxious to relax and enjoy the evening and ordered some drinks.  Luckily we were seated at a table quickly and were able to get some food.  

After we finished eating we were happy to join the party goers out on the dance floor.  We had about 30 minutes before midnight and spent the entire time dancing.  

Our attention turned to the dj as he counted down the remaining 10 seconds of 2018.  As he screamed happy new year at exactly midnight, I turned to kiss my wife.  Just as we kissed, a couple appeared next to us, telling us they were next.  I was totally caught off guard when this attractive woman started kissing me right on the mouth.  As I turned to look at my wife, she and the man were deep into a french kiss of their own. 

I took a step backward to try to see if we knew this couple.  The woman reached over and tugged at my necklace.  “We have these too,” she said, which made me smile right away.   We spent the rest of the night with this couple and that is how new years was saved!  Obviously we are so grateful that we wear this lifestyle jewelry because without it, we would have not have met them.  It was a wonderful and memorable evening!

Happy New Year to everyone!

Cheers!

Alex and Anna

Ashburn, VA

Remember to check out our lifestyle jewelry here:  https://www.swingersjewelry.net/jewelry-for-swingers/

Halloween in the lifestyle; why wearing a costume could help make your night the best ever!

Sexy swinger dressed for Halloween with Partners ID necklace
Sexy swinger dressed for Halloween with Partners ID necklace

Boo!

Halloween will be here before you know it!  What are you planning to dress up as this year?  A policeman, Little Red Ridinghood maybe a schoolgirl?

People frequently ask us what we will be dressed as for Halloween.  Naturally, our answer is always the same; swingers of course!  No, we are not party poopers and we have come up with some pretty clever costume ideas over the years.  What we have noticed, is that there are many people who take this opportunity to dress up in a way that makes them unrecognizable to others.  We believe that there is a reason they do this.
Some people in the lifestyle are extremely outgoing and have no problem approaching other couples.  Every chance they get, they mingle and flirt and generally know most of the people at any party by the end of the evening.  Then there are others who are too shy or insecure to approach other couples.  This makes Halloween the perfect opportunity for them to come out of their shells by hiding behind a costume.
Think about it, if you are wearing a mask and people cannot identify you, do you not feel bolder?   If you approach a couple and you are wearing a mask, chances are they will be very friendly because they are not sure whether or not they know you.  This is exactly what we have observed occurring every Halloween.  There are always a few couples wearing the kind of costume that makes it impossible to guess who they are.  It is very possible that some of these masked guests are new to the lifestyle. They are taking the opportunity to visit a swing club and remain anonymous.

Whatever the case, if you are one of those “shy” people, perhaps this is the perfect time for you to take advantage and go after what you want!  There are women in the lifestyle who always wear a wig when they are at a lifestyle event.  They claim they have more confidence because people do not recognize them and they like it that way.  Costumes are also a good conversation starter.  Complimenting others on how clever they are or how perfect their costume, makes it easy to open the dialogue.  Once you have begun a conversation it is easy to introduce yourselves and ask the other couple questions about themselves.

 The other fascinating part of dressing up for Halloween is noticing costume choices.  I cannot help but observe that some of the quieter more shy couples take advantage of this holiday by wearing outrageous costumes.  Some choose very provocative, sexy costumes.  Many of the timid girls tend to go for the slutty look and the men frequently focus on calling attention to their genitals in one way or another.  It always makes me wonder if they wish they could be more sexually open on regular lifestyle nights.
Even the play areas during Halloween seem busier than usual.  Many couples keep their masks on, and again, seem more determined than usual, to go after what they what.  Somehow, the use of masks in the play area is reminiscent of the movie Eyes Wide Shut ( a 1999 erotic drama film) starring Tom Cruise.
Whatever the case may be, whatever your costume of choice, tonight is the night to be bold and go for what you want.  Costumes allow us all the freedom to be someone else for an evening.  What could be more liberating than that?
Don’t forget to wear your lifestyle jewelry so even though others might not recognize you, they will recognize your jewelry!  Find it here:  https://www.swingersjewelry.net

Our jewelry helps a couple in France discover something exciting!

French couple wearing Partners ID jewelry on the beach
French couple wearing Partners ID jewelry on the beach

We love hearing from everyone all around the world about their successes wearing the jewelry. This is a letter we received from a customer about her experience with the jewelry.  It was written both in English and French and we included our response in both English and French underneath. Keep the emails coming!

Salut Partners ID,

I just wanted to drop you a line and let you know how well the jewelry works! Such a simple concept with such a great result!

I was born and raised in America, but after college I met a man and moved to the south of France with him. We lived there for 15 years. Part of my initial attraction to him was the sexual chemistry that we had (and of course his sexy French accent). It was intense and lasted quite awhile but something was always missing.

We always spend several weeks each summer at Cap D’agde (a very popular nudist and swinger village), and we always have a good time.  We spend our days naked on the beach, drink cocktails at sundown, have dinner and hit the clubs. We play mostly together, which is fine by me, but still something was missing (in my life).

It was during our last trip to Cap D’agde that we discovered your jewelry. We had seen many other couples wearing it and decided to buy pieces for ourselves. The very day I slipped on the necklace, I was alone at the beach when a woman approached me. She, too, was wearing your necklace so I knew that she was a swinger. She introduced herself and sat on the edge of my blanket. As we talked, she gently touched my leg. It was like an electric shock ran through me. She could immediately sense my response as my erect nipples were hard to hide. We sat and talked for about an hour and agreed to meet with our husbands later on at a club.

As I lay in the sun on the beach I considered my response to her touch. I had never played with another woman but the very thought of it made me extremely horny. One of the things I most enjoyed about the American club we had visited was watching women play together.  It is not as common here and I always found it a turn on.   I packed up my beach gear and rushed back to the room to talk with my husband. I told him about the beach and he laughed. We have a very open marriage and he was happy at the thought of seeing me play with another woman. We had been swinging for years but I never really had the opportunity to play with another woman.

Needless to say, that evening was the most memorable of my entire adult life. I realized that what was missing from my life was another woman! I didn’t realize that I was bisexual before. We were able to get together a few times before she left to go home to Germany and she promised to look us up when she came to the states.

Had I not been wearing the jewelry, this would never have happened. It has opened a door for me that might never have been opened, and I am grateful that this happened!

The jewelry is really beautiful and very easy to spot! As I mentioned, it is quite popular in France and now that we are back home in the states, we plan to wear it all the time.

Merci et bisous à vous!

Danielle y Marcel

Cher Danielle y Marcel,

Merci sincerement ,a tout ceux et celles qui prennent le temps de nous partager leurs enthousiasmes ,concernant notre creation de bijous libertin.Nous sommes tres fier du resultat positif ,car seulement après 2 ans de lancement ,nous recevons continuellement des temoignages encourageants comme les votres a cette effet et ce de partout dans le monde ,aussi loin que de l Australie a Dubail,du Japon a l Afrique Du Sud,d Israel passant par l Europe juste qu en Amerique du Nord ainsi que d Argentine aux Indes.Nous apprecions grandement vos commantaire ,qui nous aident a amiliorer de jour en jour, nos produits destines au monde libertin. A+

(Thank you sincerely, to all of you who take the time to share your enthusiasm concerning our creation of lifestyle jewelry. We are very proud of the positive result!  It has now been 4 years since launching the line and we continuously receive encouraging testimonials like yours about its success from all over the world. We hear from people from as far away as Australia to Dubai, Japan to South Africa, Israel passing through Europe, in North America as well as Argentina to India. We greatly appreciate your commentaries, which help us to improve from day to day. Our products are destined to be for everyone in the lifestyle all around the world.)

The lifestyle is not a cult, we do not recruit people. Is this what our vanilla friends are afraid of?

Friend backing up

Most people who are in the lifestyle go to great lengths to keep it a secret.  They do not want to reveal this to family, friends or coworkers. People in the lifestyle would agree that the majority of people in their lives would not understand. 

This is not hard to believe as people can be very judgmental, especially about things that they do not understand.  What I cannot wrap my head around are the stories about the way “friends” react if they are told.

I have heard many stories about people who told a close friend and the friend turned their back.  Some prior friends go as far as to spread the word to others, while some simply ostracize the individual or couple who divulge their secret. 

The first thing that comes to mind is the fact that these people clearly thought these were close, trustworthy friends.  Nobody goes around mentioning this kind of private detail about their life to mere acquaintances. 

It makes me think about my friends; what could they tell me about themselves that would make me turn my back on them?  That they murdered someone?  That they destroyed someone’s life?  Stole someone’s money?  Hurt someone’s children?  Whatever it might be, it would have to be something really horrific.  

How many times have people revealed to a friend that they were having an affair?  I don’t recall hearing that their friends deserted them when they were told.  Why then is it acceptable to reject a friend for a lifestyle choice that he or she has made?  

The lifestyle is not a cult, we do not recruit people.  Is that what people are afraid of?  That we will try to convert them? Do people imagine that swingers have no self -control and they will hit on everyone they know?  That our friends are no longer safe around us because we cannot control our desire for sex?

Honestly, when you think about it, it makes no sense.  Why have we evolved so much in every other arena when it comes to accepting human sexuality, except for swingers?  People applaud transgender people for opening up and doing what is right for them.  The gay and lesbian community is stronger than ever and they no longer feel the need to hide.  Heck, NY has a list of 33 acceptable genders and people are not ok with swingers?  

I once asked a friend (yes, she knows we are in the lifestyle and she is still my friend.  She is also a psychologist) if she has any idea as to what it is that makes people so afraid.  I say afraid because I honestly have no other explanation for the way people react to swingers.  

She believes that most people are so insecure about their own lives and relationships that the thought of opening themselves up to others was too much to think about.  Her belief is that it is probably more often a female friend who turns their back while men might become curious.  All of the sudden, a close female friend is sexualizing herself and an insecure woman might  see this as a threat to her own relationship.  The fear is that if  her husband or boyfriend knows, he will find this friend suddenly more appealing.  

Whether or not this is always the case, it makes some sense.  Whatever the reason might be, it is rare that friends who are not in the lifestyle will remain in your life if they discover.  Not today anyway, but hopefully in the future people will gain an understanding and an acceptance.  It really is time.

The black rings are back in stock! Come check out all of our lifestyle jewelry here: https://www.swingersjewelry.net/jewelry-for-swingers/

“I never thought it would happen to me!” A swinger’s story…

Hi Partners ID.  I love reading your blog but I especially like to read the emails you receive from folks who have had success with the jewelry.  Just like most things in life, I never thought it would happen to me but it did!  Magical!

We have been swingers for about 5 years and mostly seek out parties at hotels near where we live.  It can be a bit frustrating because we would like to have more of a swinger social life but we really don’t have a club close enough to drive just for an evening.  

To try to satisfy our desire to immerse ourselves in swinging, we took a vacation in August to Hedonism.   That’s where we discovered your jewelry.  It worked like a charm in Jamaica because people could identify that we were swingers and so they approached us.  To be honest, we weren’t really sure if we would have any success with the jewelry back at home.

I wear my necklace every day for two reasons:  first, because I love the design and second, obviously, because I would like to meet other swingers.  

We live in a wonderful community and have met many of our neighbors since moving in last year.  We got a note in our mailbox a few weeks ago inviting us to their annual block party.  We are a very social couple and looked forward to spending the afternoon with everyone while hoping to meet some new people.  

We offered to help with the setup and spent the evening before the party baking goodies to share with our neighbors.  We arrived early and were greeted by a couple we had not yet met.  They were quite a bit older than we are but were so warm and welcoming.  They mentioned that their son and his wife would be attending the party and hoped we would get a chance to meet them.  

We were impressed with the turnout for the party!  There were well over 100 people out on the street enjoying the food, music, games and socializing.  At one point my husband left me talking with another couple to run back and get us some drinks.  He ran into the older couple that we had helped with the setup.  They were with their son and his wife and were thrilled to be able to introduce them to my husband.  

A short time later my husband returned and he was with another couple who seemed anxious to meet me.  I politely excused myself and went over to meet them.  With a big smile on his face, my husband introduced me to this couple, who are about the same age we are.  I went to shake the man’s hand and he pulled me in for a kiss.  I was a little stunned until he whispered in my ear to look at his bracelet.  Sure enough, there it was!  He, too, was wearing your jewelry!  OMG, I was so excited to meet them!  We spent the entire rest of the day with them and the next night as well!  The best part is, since his parents are our neighbors, they come to town quite often.  

Such a great concept!  Thank you again for what you are doing for the lifestyle!  Like I said, it’s magical!

~Lisa and Doug

Colorado (too small a town to name!)