A couple reveals that they have been exposed.

Lifestyle couple wearing siwinger jewelry

Well, it finally happened.  We were outed about being in the lifestyle.  

That’s right, after 8 years of sneaking around trying to be discreet, our secret is out.  Although we thought we did everything right, apparently someone figured out that we are swingers, and spilled the beans.  

Are you sure people know you are swingers?

Yes, someone confronted us and told us they knew.  Word gets around quickly when the gossip is this juicy.  We live in a rather densely populated city yet it is a small community.   An everyone knows everyone’s kind of place.

Why do you say, “It finally happened?”  

I think most people in the lifestyle are afraid that one day people will find out.  Obviously this is not something we wanted, but now we have to deal with the repercussions.  

Who told you?

When we were confronted with the news, it was over drinks at a friend’s home.  We were surprised when they invited us to their home, as we normally go out for drinks.   These are people who we see at least once a week for drinks, dinner or, brunch.  They had become suspicious of us when we became too busy to meet them on weekends.  We were scheduling time with them primarily during the week and they found that odd.  

Although they did not try to investigate, when they heard the rumors they immediately believed it was a possibility.  Seeing the photos from our online dating site sealed the deal.   

Do you mean the photos are not secure?

We assume the couple who discovered us was also on the site and saw our photos.  I guess they took screenshots and showed them to other people.  It is so disappointing that anyone would do that, but they did.  Clearly these are people who do not like us.

How did you react to the news?

When we were confronted, we were in shock.  At first, we tried to deny it but it was clear that people had seen the photos.  Our friends wanted to know why we would do this.  When the shock wore off, I asked them what that meant.  Why would we do what?  Explore a lifestyle that seemed of interest to us both?  Spend nights and weekends at parties enjoying new friends?  Opening up our minds to something different?  Trying something new together?

How did your friends react to your explanation?

The man was curious and asked a lot of questions while his wife was disgusted and angry.  She implied that it was my (the man’s) way of cheating on my wife.  Although my wife explained that we were doing this as a couple and decided together, our female friend was not buying it.  Of course, the photos did not help our case.  The majority were taken of my wife; some with other women and all in erotic poses.  

What is your take on your friends’ reactions?

My wife believes the woman felt threatened.  That somehow my wife feeling ok about exploring her sexuality and sexual prowess with me made her husband envious.  The husband seemed to find the whole thing interesting and enticing.  He was clearly looking at my wife with renewed interest.  He seemed to see her in a new light and his wife did not appreciate that.

How do you see your friendship with this couple in the future?

I can see the man reaching out to me on his own but as couples, we won’t see them again.  The woman is clearly not comfortable with what we are doing and prefers to cut ties with us.  Somehow I think she believes either others will find her guilty by association or is afraid of her husband will show interest in joining us.  

What about the rest of the people who now know that you are in the lifestyle?

I think had this happened a few years ago when we were new to the lifestyle we would have been much more upset.  Over the years we have made many friends who have become almost like family to us.  We have also grown to accept who we are and the fact that others might not understand our lifestyle choices.  Honestly, it is ok.  Although we had not planned to tell our families, we decided it was time.  No one seemed terribly surprised.  Thankfully our children are grown with families of their own. 

What is your takeaway from what has happened?

I am in no way surprised to find people judging us for what we do.  Most people in the lifestyle realize that vanilla people don’t accept swingers and do not want to be associated with them.  We will continue to hold our heads high and see what the future holds.  As an independent contractor, it is a possibility that it will impact my business.  For my wife, it is also a possibility that she could end up losing her job if they discover the truth.  It makes us both sad to see how afraid people are of what they don’t understand.  Worst case scenario?  We relocate and start fresh.

Thank you so much for your time and we wish you all the best in the future.  We are also sorry that you have to experience this.  

Looking to find others in the lifestyle?  Wearing our swinger symbol jewelry can help with that! Shop here:

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Why is it a secret that you are in the lifestyle? https://www.swingersjewelry.net/secret-lifestyle/

Your lifestyle jewelry made Thanksgiving into a night to remember!

Lifestyle woman wearing Partners ID jewelry

 

 

Dear Partners ID,

All I can say is you were not kidding!  We read often where you tell people to wear the jewelry and others will spot you!

This happened on Thursday at Thanksgiving dinner!  This would be the last place I would have ever imagined meeting another person in the lifestyle.

I have been in the lifestyle for about 8 years.  My boyfriend and I were experimenting with swinging and I loved it.  He did not and this actually caused us to break up.  Please, no tears, it was for the best.  

It has been a wonderful experience for me both as a part of a  couple and now as a single woman.  The people I meet are friendly and warm and my intention is to find a man (or woman) to be my partner in the lifestyle and possibly more.

My parents are divorced and my dad remarried many years ago.  We do not live in the same state and so I do not see him often.  This Thanksgiving I was invited to join him and his “other” family for the week.  Thanksgiving dinner was at his wife’s daughter’s home.  (I suppose I could call her my step sister but I do not.)  

Anyway, we arrived at her apartment and there were about 15 people invited for dinner.  Of those 15, I knew only 3 people.  I knew I was in for a very long and boring night.  My dad poured himself a glass of scotch and I asked for the same.  The only safe place to sit without having anyone on top of me was a lazy boy chair in the corner of the room.  I settled into the chair with my drink and observed the people moving around making small talk.  

A couple walked in and they were making their way around the room greeting all of the other guests.  When she leaned over to kiss my dad hello I spotted the charms on her necklace as they dangled from her open collared shirt.  It was hard to see at first because she had 2 other charms on the necklace, but I was pretty sure she was wearing your pendant. 

Finally ater greeting the other guests, she was alone pouring a drink so I made my way over to where she was standing.  She turned and smiled, introducing herself.  As I shook her hand I looked closely at the necklace and then I knew for sure.  The necklace had the lifestyle pendant and a heart on either side of the pendant.  Pointing to her necklace I told her I also have the pendant but mine is on an anklet which I never thought to wear for Thanksgiving!  

Long story short, we giggled through dinner and made an early exit.  My father was thrilled to see me hitting it off with some of his wife’s relatives and we laughed about this in the elevator ride down after dinner.   It was an awesome night!  I ended up staying at their home for the night (I didn’t say sleeping because we did not sleep until early morning).  

Moral of the story:  Wear the jewelry!  It is true that you never know where you will find someone in the lifestyle!

Thanks and happy holidays!

xo

Jasmine

Phoenix, Arizona

My name is Chris and I’ve been swinging for over 20 years.

Chris, who has been swinging for 20 years, sipping coffee wearing a Partners ID necklace
Man sipping coffe wearing Partners ID necklace.

My name is Chris and I have been swinging for over 20 years.  This is the first time I have ever met swingers without actually seeking them out either online or by attending a swinger’s event.

I often travel for business and my wife and I have an open marriage. What happens on the road, stays on the road and what my wife does while I’m on the road is all good. (I just want to hear all about it).

Recently my work took me to Boston, MA and while I have been there before, I never really thought of is as a place that would be riddled with swingers. Boston is a college town with so many young people that I never thought much about swinging when I visited in the past.

What set this trip apart was that my wife surprised me for our anniversary and bought me a beautiful gold and silver necklace from you, which of course has the pendant for swingers. I wear it everyday but never really expected to meet random swingers. Well, I was wrong on two accountants. First, Boston is a whole lot more than a college town, and second, you will meet random swingers when you wear the jewelry.

After spending the morning in a meeting, I needed to get some fresh air. I walked out to find a Starbucks so I could sit and answer some emails on my computer. I ordered some coffee, sat down at a table, and got to work. About 5 minutes after sitting down, a couple walked over and asked if they could sit at the table with me. I glanced up at them and told them no problem. We were sitting in a corner where we had relative privacy. Starbucks was busy and it was quite loud. I looked back down and started to type when I overheard the conversation between the couple. They were discussing their travel plans for an upcoming vacation to Miami and how they were excited to finally meet a couple they were talking to on SDC. As soon as I heard SDC I looked up and they were both looking at me. I didn’t say anything but the woman asked me if I was on SDC. I was taken aback but then she pointed to my necklace.

Honestly I couldn’t believe it! I took out my headphones and told her I was on SDC and assumed they were as well. She opened her bag, took out a card and handed it to me. She said she hoped to hear from me soon. With that, the two of the them got up from the table and left. I was so shocked I could barely believe what had just happened. How lucky to be in the right place at the right time!

Needless to say, i immediately signed on to SDC to check them out. They looked to be a very hot couple who are totally open so I sent them an email telling them I was only in town until the next day but would love to meet up with them. I got a response from them within a half an hour inviting me to their home that evening.

I won’t go into too much detail but I will say it was a wonderful experience that I would never have had if it were not for wearing your necklace. As you can see I have placed an order for a few more pieces. Although my new friends knew what the jewelry meant, they did not own the jewelry. As a thank you I have purchased these pieces for them.

I’m very excited for what I might experience in the future. We have been swinging for more than 20 years and nothing like this has ever happened to me before. This is a great help for swingers who like to meet others in unlikely places.

That’s my story!

Chris K.

Chicago, IL