Swingers are not the only people hanging around at swing clubs.

Swingers talking to vanilla girl, both wearing Partners ID jewelry
Swinger friends talking to vanilla girl, both wearing Partners ID jewelry

Swing clubs have changed dramatically over the years

Many years ago, when the baby boomers made up the majority of swingers, swinging was much less complicated. When people showed up at a swing club, you knew they had to do their homework to even find the place! Before the internet, finding other swingers, or a place to swing, was much more difficult. If you didn’t find it in a magazine or hear it by word of mouth, there was really no other way to know about it.

Besides being difficult to find, swing clubs were illegal and visiting one was risky, people never knew which night the club could be raided by police and they would all be arrested. Curiosity seekers were not going to chance checking out a swing club. The only customers swing clubs were seeing were hard core swingers. It created a cohesive group of swingers who were there for one reason, and that was to swing.

What we see in swing clubs today is nothing like the swing clubs of the past. Today, when you are in a swing club, some people are there to swing and some people are not. It seems that at the more popular swing clubs, as much as 40% of the people in the clubs are not swingers at all.

Why go to a swing club if you are not a swinger?

Swing clubs have become hip places to go. Years ago, strip clubs fell into favor with couples who were looking to shake things up. It was risqué to tell your friends that you had been in a strip club. With the exposure that swing clubs have gotten over the past few years, they have taken over as the new racy spot to be seen. It’s not uncommon to see people whip out a camera and start taking pictures under the sign for the club outside and then again upfront inside the club. Years ago, if you even took out your phone, you would be asked to put it away for fear that you might capture someone in a picture.

What does a non swinger do in a swing club?

For people who are not familiar with a swing club, many of them are as beautiful as any big city night club. Although they require a membership plus an entrance fee, once you are inside, in most clubs, everything else is on the house. You bring your own liquor so you are not paying through the nose for your drinks, mixers and sodas are available free and most clubs have dinner, and some even have breakfast. There is always a dj and the dance floors usually have very updated lighting and special effects. They show music videos and porn on big screens around the clubs.

As for the backroom or playroom, most couples who are not swingers remain up front for the duration of their night. Just like any other club, they dance, drink and socialize. When they are ready to leave, they head out of the club. For the couples who are curious, they tend to sit and watch others playing in the back or walk around to see what it’s all about. Not surprisingly, swingers do not appreciate seeing them in the play area. Even for couples who are exhibitionists, non swingers are not a welcome sight and are easy to spot.

How can you tell who the swingers are?

The first part of the equation is to filter out the swingers from the others. Even seasoned swingers have trouble distinguishing between the two. Most couples who enjoy swing clubs are very social. They like the atmosphere and easily assimilate socially in the front of the club. What they don’t realize, is that swingers are there to swing, not to entertain curiosity seekers. Once swingers have come to the realization that you are not there to swing, most will simply say hello and avoid you.

Let us not confuse newbies with vanilla people. Newbies are welcome at any club as everyone at one time was in their situation. Besides, they are people who want to swing, vanilla people do not. They are strictly looking to be part of the scene. They like the environment and the energy of a swing club. More often than not, vanilla people will come to a club as a group. They are not looking to meet other couples as they are not swingers. Those who do come alone (as a couple), might try to socialize but when another couple realizes they do not swing, the swingers will move on.

Swingers are not opposed to couples who come to swing clubs and strictly play with each other. Some couples are exhibitionists and enjoy when others watch them. Swing clubs are an acceptable place for couples like this. Swing clubs, however, are not a place for curiosity seekers to visit or frequent.

For vanilla couples who enjoy the sexually charged environment of a swing club, a strip club might be a better alternative. These establishments are more suited for their desire to watch others while not engaging.

Why private parties have fallen into favor with swingers.

Years ago, if swingers were looking to swing, they went to a swing club. It was rare that people would host private swinger parties in their home. Most people did not want to host a party where people would have sex all over their house and they would be left to clean up the condoms the next morning.

Since swing clubs have become more diluted and the percentage of swingers in any swing club has declined dramatically, private parties have become more popular. Swingers now choose to host events where the only requirement of the attendees is to swing. A private invite only party is the only way to ensure that the group will consist strictly of swingers. Someone at a party we attended recently said, “Wouldn’t it be great if someone opened a club for swingers so we wouldn’t have to keep planning private parties?” Sad, but true, swing clubs that are strictly for swingers, no longer exists. Even a private club that requires a membership is not a sacred swinger place any more.

Vanilla couples who read this might think swingers are snobs for the way that they feel but let us look at this in another way. If swing clubs did not exist and swingers were forced to meet at regular clubs, how would the vanilla population respond? “Get a room” would probably be a common phrase thrown at couples who display any public affection. Straight people do not have a lot of tolerance for swingers and are the first to admit they do not approve of this lifestyle.

Let’s look at this way…

How about if people who do not gamble hang out in casinos. They sit at the blackjack table or crowd around a craps table and watch. The people gambling would be forced to maneuver around them to do what they came for, which is gamble.

Have you ever gone into Starbucks to have a cup of coffee with a friend but there are no empty seats. There are many people sitting on computers at tables but many are not even drinking coffee. I imagine most people are frustrated by this and wonder why they are there if not to drink coffee.

This very same principle applies to swingers. If you are not a swinger, why are you hanging around a swing club? The truth is, swingers are in a swing club to meet other swingers, period. It is not that we are snobs or unfriendly or don’t like to meet others. It is actually the exact opposite. Swingers are going to swing clubs to meet other swingers. If we were looking to spend time with or meet vanilla people, there are endless other places we would be, but the one place we would not be, is in a swing club.