Swingers and strangers; the dangers of picking up a stranger for a night of fun.

Hotel doorway
Couple walking into a hotel

It seems that while we are in the thick of the pandemic, many swingers are still looking to play.  With swing clubs and lifestyle resorts closed (for the most part), some swingers are opting to find fun on their own.  This story reminds us of the danger of trusting strangers.*

Swingers like to have a good time but sometimes in their quest for the next great adventure, they might forget to think about their own safety. This is an email we received from a woman who wanted to share her story about having sex with a total stranger.  (We struggled with whether or not to post this but decided it is a story worth reading).  Although some people might argue that swingers in swing clubs and at lifestyle events are strangers, they really are not. Every club requires a membership which means everyone must register with their driver’s license, among other things. Even private parties do not usually include complete strangers. Most form a guestlist through swinger dating sites, which also have memberships.

No matter where or with whom you choose to swing, it is always important to use common sense. It is no different if you are single and dating, you must make sure to think about your safety at all times.  Although the fantasy of sex with strangers turns some people on,  the reality is not always what you might expect.

This is the email we received from a woman; we are glad to hear she is ok:

Rob and I were out of town and having drinks at a local bar. We met this really hot guy and decided I should flirt with him to see if maybe he would come back to our room and have sex with me while Rob watched. He was so big and muscular, exactly my type. I approached him and he was flirting back. I pointed to my husband and told him we are swingers and my husband would only want to watch. He seemed a little apprehensive at first but he soon agreed and followed us to the hotel.

We went upstairs and had a drink to help make him feel more comfortable. My husband sat in a chair across the room and gave us the sign to go ahead and forget he was there. The guy was really hot and things moved really fast. He tried to enter me without a condom but Rob was very vocal about that not happening and handed the guy a condom. He slipped it on and was really turned on. I glanced across the room to Rob, and he was sitting with his pants around his ankles.
I was having a great time when the guy flipped me over.  At first, I thought he was just going to do me from behind but he was trying for anal. Although I tried to stop him, he was becoming very aggressive. Before I knew it, he was totally inside and it was very painful. I was telling him to stop and Rob got up from the chair to approach us. The guy turned around and told Rob to “sit the fuck down”. At this point, I realized we were in a bad spot. It was like being raped while my husband was trying to talk him down. He was no physical match for this guy and we both knew it. Long story short, he finished, got dressed, and left. To make matters worse, his condom was not on when he pulled out. First I thought it slipped off inside me but I saw it on the floor and it was not used.

I know there are many couples out there who like to pick up strangers for a night of wild sex but after this experience, I realize how incredibly stupid it is. The truth is, I feel lucky that nothing worse had happened. He could have robbed us or killed us, we were so vulnerable. I have been tested for STDs and thankfully I am clean.
From now on, we will stick with swinging at our local club where there is security to prevent this type of situation. It is not safe to put yourself in a situation like this with a total stranger. I have nightmares almost every night, reliving this terrifying evening.

Sorry to bring such a terrible thing to swingers but I want people to realize that although picking up strangers sounds like fun, it is not worth the possible consequences.

Thanks for listening!

J.R and R.R

*We at Partners ID do not condone playing at this time.  This was sent to us several years ago.  Please stay safe!