Is a poor body image keeping you from feeling confident in the lifestyle? Do you worry that having a less than perfect figure will make it hard to find couples who want to swing with you?
The lifestyle poses many challenges to both men and women. It can be very difficult for someone if they are shy, insecure, become jealous easily and worst of all, if they have a poor self image. Having a positive self image, especially regarding your body, is crucial if you are planning to swing. Body image is defined as how you see yourself when you look in the mirror or how you picture yourself in your mind. Sometimes these perceptions are accurate, but sometimes they are completely distorted and affect how you carry yourself and how you interact with others. Developing a positive body image and a healthy mental attitude is crucial to a person’s happiness and wellness, and plays a key role to success in the lifestyle.
Swing clubs, parties and hotel takeovers are filled with scantily clad women wearing fishnet dresses, sexy lingerie and exotic mini skirts and dresses which all show a lot of skin. Many of these women are over the age of 40 and have bodies which indicate as much. There are women who have beautiful, tight, fit bodies but they are not in the majority. They are also not always the hottest or the most secure. It seems that self image plays a much larger role in what makes a woman desirable to both men and other women. A beautiful, fit woman with poor body image (yes, there are many) seems to be less attractive to others than the overweight woman who is comfortable in her own skin and has an aura of self confidence. The lifestyle is not about the most attractive person or people, and it is important to remember that everyone is attracted to something different. A person who is friendly and warm and seems genuinely interested in what you have to say, will be much more attractive to you than someone who is the opposite; regardless of their physical appearance.
Men suffer from the same problem but regarding different aspects of their bodies. Women tend to be focused on their weight, their breasts and any areas of their bodies they see as imperfect; cellulite on their thighs, a butt that is too large or too small, scars from past surgeries or c sections, etc. Men tend to be more concerned with their height, their weight, their muscle mass and obviously the size of their penis, as compared with other men. Interestingly enough, if you were to ask ten men to point out which woman they find most attractive, chances are you would get 6-7 different responses. For women it would probably be about the same. Luckily, everyone is attracted to something different. Imagine if everyone was attracted to the same person!
The lifestyle is supposed to be fun. When people get too hung up about their bodies and their imperfections it can be a real downer. Try to remember that swinging is for a short time and if you don’t take advantage of the moment, you will miss it. Chances are if someone has chosen to swing with you, it is because they think it will be enjoyable. If you cannot relax and savor the moment, you are not only wasting your night but the night of the person who is trying to have fun with you. I sincerely doubt that while your partner for the evening is playing with you he is thinking about your thighs. If, however, you are showing your insecurities regarding your thighs, he probably will look at them to decide if you are right. When a woman is with a man who is less endowed than most, she will only care if it keeps him from being able to enjoy himself. If he steps up and shows her he is confident with himself, she knows it will be a fun night regardless of his size.
When everyone in the back room is naked and you appear with something covering you, whether it’s a towel or some garment wrapped around your mid section, chances are everyone will notice you because you are different. If you step into the play area with nothing but a smile, people will admire your confidence and appreciate that about you. If you are open to people they will look to join you, it’s that simple. Big thighs, sagging boobs, cellulite and all, if you show people that you are ok with yourself, they will be ok with you.
Swing clubs, parties and take overs can be fun and exciting. People come out to party and have a good time. When you meet people, if they seem friendly and self confident you are drawn to them. If, on the other hand, you meet people who are shy and withdrawn, chances are you will move on to another couple. It really is ok if you don’t think you are perfect because guess what? Pretty much everyone else has the same insecurities that you have, the only difference is that they refuse to let it ruin their night!
Remeber to check out our lifestyle jewelry! New items are offered frequently and we are happy to take custom orders.