Swinging can sometimes be a beautiful expression of love. I have no doubt that when some people see this title and they are not in the lifestyle, it will conjure up an image of a 1960s love fest; something reminiscent of Woodstock. This really could not be farther from my point.
I met a couple last night while at a swing club and speaking with them really opened my eyes to how love can play a part in swinging. This couple met when they were kids and were married before they even graduated from high school. They entered the lifestyle as a mutual decision because neither had ever had sex with anyone else and as a couple they were honest enough to express their curiosity.
I don’t believe that most people can be this honest with their spouse. If couples were able to have this level of honest communication, there would be a lot less infidelity and a lot more swingers!
This couple is adorable to listen to. The woman told us that prior to the lifestyle, she had not realized that her husband was not only a good lover but he was well endowed! She had nothing to compare him with prior to her first experience as a swinger. He echoed a similar sentiment and it made me realize how swinging has really helped to elevate their relationship to a whole new level.
This is an aspect of swinging that is lost to the vanilla world. Without having these experiences, they cannot relate to the degree of honesty and trust that is needed to do this. To have an honest conversation with your spouse about having a desire to have sex with someone else is not easy. We all already know this, as we see time and time again on all of the forums, where newcomers are asking how to bring up the subject to their significant other. Most people would be highly insulted and hurt to hear their partner admit that they would like to try having sex with someone else. The initial reaction is to think something is wrong with you and that is why your partner is seeking something else. The truth is, if your partner didn’t love and respect you, they would do what most people who are not in the lifestyle do, they would simply do it behind your back. When your partner wants to include you in this, it is only because they love and respect you. When done correctly, the lifestyle can bring couples closer than ever.
Love and sex are both wonderful and when the two are not mutually exclusive, anything is possible.